Bowser's summer holiday
by SouthAmericanToxicBadger
Summary: Bowser goes on holiday! Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay! Day 5 is up!
1. THE BEGINNING

**THE BEGINNING **

(Of this Fan. Fic, not the beginning of time)

Two goombas were on guard duty at a koopa military base. Neither of them had AK-47s. They were called Dougal and Frank.

Frank: We should get AK-47s!

Dougal: Yeah! How are we supposed to guard this place without proper weapons! A baby could get past us!

Baby Mario: I sure could!

Then Baby Mario rolled past them and blew up the base.

Frank: Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww, **SHIT!**

Meanwhile…

Bowser was sitting in his throne room. He was very happy because the "Koopa Kids" were away at boarding school, so Bowser Jr. was the only one at home to annoy him.

Jr: How are babies made, dad?

Bowser: Errrr…well…. you see…

Koopa: Your majesty!

Bowser: Great timing! Sorry Junior!

Koopa: Sir, some little #/& has blow up a military base.

Bowser: That's it! I just got away from the kids, Jr.'s asking me awkward questions, Peach won't sleep with me….

Koopa: Well, you did kidnap her.

Bowser: And now this! I need a holiday…

Koopa: Thought you might! So I bought you tickets for a two-week holiday with ten friends, in Isle Delfino!

Bowser: Nice!

Koopa: Can I come?

Bowser: No. I'll bring Jr, Petey Piranha, King Boo, two goomba guards, that cool blue-shelled koopa from multiplayer "New Super Mario Bros.", Peach (he he), the lakitu from "Mario Kart", Kamek and an Ukiki (monkey enemies)! Let's go!

Everyone coming: Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!

Koopa: Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww…..

I hope you like my new Fan Fic.! This might mean that the next chapter of "We've got our own problems" will be delayed! Sorry!


	2. Day 1

_Day 1 _

The plane journey

Everyone was at the airport. It turns out the goombas are Frank and Dougal, the blue-shelled koopa's called Henry, the lakitu's called Mr. Doolally, and the ukiki's called Ben. They were finding out what aisle they and to go to.

Airport staff: Aisle 900,00000,000000,000000,000000,00000,00000000,0000000,0000,00000,0000,0000,00000,00,00, sir.

Bowser: What the hell!

About 6 hours of walking later….

Bowser: Ahh, we made it!

Airport staff: Sorry, I meant aisle 1, sir.

Bowser: What the hell (again).

About 6 hours of walking later….

Bowser: Stupid…. Big….. airport…..

Jr: Can I have a lolly dad?

Bowser: If you buy it with your own money.

Jr: But I'm skint!

Bowser: Then… errr…

Henry: Go rob a bank or something!

Bowser: Yeah! What he said!

Jr: Ok dad!

Octorok: Chedda cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeese!

Ben: That was more random than the minus world glitch on "Super Mario Bros."

Airport staff: Get on the plane, please, sir.

Bowser: Stop calling me sir!

Airport staff: Ok, sir.

Bowser: Go to hell!

Kamek: This plane is comfy!

Pilot: The plane will be lifting off in 2 minutes.

Everyone sat down. Bowser was next to Peach (he he), Kamek and Jr. were behind them, with Petey and King Boo behind them, then Frank and Dougal, then Ben and Mr. Doolally, and finally Henry and his Bazooka.

Henry: Who's a lovely gun then! Goochie goochie gooo!

Ok…… It was a small luxury plane, and the only other people on it were me, because I write this crap so I have to come, a shy-guy, Chief Chilly and randomly enough, Basil Brush.

Basil Brush: **Boom boom! **

Mr. Doolally: Shut up!

Basil Brush: **No! Boom boom! **

Mr. Doolally: If there was no risk of some financial loss I would be tempted to punch you in the face.

Then the plane took off.

Pilot: We are now in the air. No using electrical equipment such as Game Boys….

Jr: Awwwwww!

Pilot: Counterfeit money printers…

Mr. Doolally: Awwwwwww!

Pilot: Fruit smoothie makers….

Ben: Awwwwwwww!

Pilot: Or scary light-up masks while the plane is flying. And no shooting guns.

Henry: Awwwwwwwww!

Pilot: Thank you.

Ben: I suspect you're gay, Mr. Doolally.

Mr.Doolally: Well you're wrong!

Ben: Then how come there are **_TWO_ **condoms in your suitcase?

Mr. Doolally: I, err..

Kamek: So, Chief Chilly, what brings you here?

Chief Chilly: I am here to represent the parliament of the snow regions of the Mushroom Kingdom in this Fan Fic. These include Cold Cold Mountain, Snowman's land, World 5 from Yoshi's Island and Joke's end. Believe me the, politians in Joke's end are stupider than George Bush and Tony Blaire, put together! Well maybe not that stupid but they're damn stupid ok! I personally think I make a very good vice president in Snowman's land but I think I should be Prime Minister! I mean, I think I'd be better than the current Prime Minister, the snowman from "Animal Crossing: Wild World" which you must build to get the snowman furniture. And what is the world coming to! I mean, any stupid slob can get into the House of Lords if they want to! Even you Kamek!

Kamek: What's that supposed to mean!

Shy-guy: Has anybody got a hot dog I could "borrow"?

Everyone: **NO! **

Basil Brush: **Boom boom!**

Petey: What are you gonna do when we arrive, King Boo? I'm gonna walk around not wearing anything!

King Boo: Son of a (interval)!

When the plane at last arrived, everyone got in crappy hire car (except the shy guy, Chief Chilly and Basil Brush), drove to their hotel, and slept in the car because they couldn't be arsed choosing beds yet.

Thank you krisetchers for your review!


	3. Day 2

_Day 2 _

Getting settled in

In the morning Bowser stood up and yawed. But he was in a car so he smacked his head on the ceiling.

Bowser: **OW!** Why I should pummel the crap out of you, stupid car!

Mr.Doolally: **NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! **You might get charged money!

Bowser: Let's choose beds!

They went into the hotel. It was all posh with big flashing lights saying "HOTEL DELFINO." And they had it all to themselves. The hallway was centered around a big wooden pillar, with steps around it leading to the attic. The steps were pink boos.

King Boo: Cruelty!

Bowser: Peach (he he) and I are having the big master bedroom. Jr, Frank and Dougal will go in the nursery. Kamek will go too, so he can watch them.

Dougal: **WHAT? **

Bowser: You behave like two year olds! Mr. Doolally and Henry will sleep in the right hand room…

Henry screams in fear.

Bowser: But Mr. Doolally will be chained to his bed. Petey in the left hand room and King Boo in the attic…

King Boo: But there should be another bed for me!

Bowser: Yeah, but do you want to be in the same room as him when Petey walks around…

King Boo: Ok I see!

Bowser: And Ben in that potted plant in the corner.

Ben: Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww….

Bowser: Look! I threw a banana in there!

Ben: Oh I love bananas! Yum yum yummy!

And he jumped into the tree.

Bowser: Ok, everyone happy?

Frank, Dougal, King Boo and Ben: **NO!**

Bowser: Good! Now let's get unpacked!

An hour later Bowser had finished unpacking, and he fancied some relaxation time. So he headed to the outdoor Jacuzzi. Peach and Petey were already there. So he got in.

Bowser: Ahhh, what a lovely d, **PUT THOSE BACK ON! **

Petey: Awwwwwwwwwwww…..

Peach: Awwwwwwwwwwwwww…

Bowser: No, wait, Peach! You don't need to…. Awwww crap.

Peach: Pervert!

And this leads perfectly on to later that night, at bedtime, when Bowser asked Peach a question. The answer was a slap.

Back in the present Jr. was throwing a party in the nursery. He had invited…. Well, the people who are staying in the nursery, dumbass!

Jr: Thanks for coming and… aww lets just cut the crap and on with it! Dougal, where did you put that alcohol?

Kamek: Tut-tut Jr! You're under-age!

Jr: So? We're in France, everybody's crazy here!

Kamek: We're not in France!

Jr: Ah, whatever.

Frank: Ahhh.. (drinks stupid amount of champagne) I feel treated like my age again.

At dinner time…

Everybody was seated around a bamboo table, eating pasta.

Ben: Hey! It's got yellow stuff on it!

King Boo: That's called cheese, Ben.

Ben: **WOW!** I've never tried this "cheese" before!

King Boo: Go on then, try some!

Ben: Ok! Mmmmmmmmmm…. It tastes like….. Cheese.

King Boo: How would you know, you said you'd never had it before!

Ben: Of course I've had….

Suddenly Octorok took over his soul for a few seconds.

Ben: Chedda cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeese!

King Boo: For god's sake Ben, you don't _let _people have your soul, you _sell _iton Ebay for millions of coins!

Ben: What happened?

I hope it was funny! Thanks to Raykura-Kura for the review, please give more! As you can see, I've added a bit on from the original end, as promised. Look out for Day 3!


	4. Day 3

_Day 3 _

Going out

Bowser yawned. He'd had a good night's sleep, although something was missing. He saw Peach was asleep. He grinned.

Bowser: **MWA HAA HA HA, WAAAAAAR HAR HAR-DIE HAR, HE HAW HE HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE, HA HO HO,** he he…. ha.

But then his loud evil laughing woke Peach up.

Bowser: Crap.

But luckily for him Peach was to thick to realise why Bowser was laughing in an evil sort of way.

Then Ben walked in, looking kind of dizzy. He straight away walked into the bedpost, and then continued to do so.

Ben: Eh, Bowsa! Stop lol 'cause you wanna get Peach in her sleep in, yer naw, a vibration sorta' way! You're gonna get PWN3D!

Peach slapped Bowser.

Peach: Pervert! Anyway, what hit you Ben?

Ben: Eh, I think someone put alcohol in me 'nanas!

Bowser: Oh don't worry, it will run off in about an hou- shit.

Ben hit Bowser.

Ben: Bastard!

Then Jr. walked in with a really big lolly.

Bowser: Hey Jr! How did you buy that?

Jr: With stolen money.

Bowser: Well done son!

Jr: I stole it from you.

Bowser: Why you little son of a gay man!

Jr: You're my dad.

Bowser: **SHIT!!!**

Ben: Soz, bat I g2g.

Bowser: Err, why are you speaking using internet slang?

Ben: 'Cause I'm drunc! I dunnie lake tit eitha!

Bowser: You don't use internet slang when you're drunk.

Octorok: Shit! Now you have given away that I'm not very good at making people appear drunk! Oh, and chedda cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeese!!!

Ben: You mean I only appear to be drunk? I'm not _actually _drunk! Yaaaaaay!

Octorok: No, you are really drunk.

Ben: Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! Dow I dust peak willy again!

Jr: That sounds disturbing.

Later, at breakfast, Bowser had an announcement to make.

Bowser: Ok everybody, please shut up now!

Everybody stopped talking except Dougal, who continued his conversation unaware.

Dougal: And then, see, Hurricane Katrina hit and the sexy lady's clothes were blown off and she was like, only in a bikini! And I got it on film! Wait, why has everyone gone quiet- oh, right (looks embarrassed).

Bowser: Anyway, as I was _trying _to say, you're all going to go out to a restaurant!

Jr: Are you coming Papa?

Bowser: **HELL NO!!!** I'm gonna check out the hotel casino and bar!

Peach: Humph!

Bowser: No- I mean… but- c'mon Peach and- well I'll cha …… crap.

Petey: Well if there's a casino I'm staying! Actually I'm only interested in getting drunk at the bar, but….

King Boo: I'm staying for, (looks quickly left and right suspiciously) reasons….

Mr.Doolally: I need to make some money, and, err, other things.

Mr.Doolally pulled Henry away screaming.

Henry: Oh God save me! Help me, anybody! I don't want to be gay! Save my guns too! Oh, and Peach, Bowser thinks you've got a nice pair of bazookas.

Bowser: Henry, you be my right-hand man and keep these people under control. And put him down Mr.Doolally.

Henry: Phew!

And so they all walked off to Delfino Plaza. Bowser was watching Peach go.

Bowser: Petey, I think I'm in love.

Petey: Or you just want to…

Bowser: That too.

In Delfino Plaza there were several restaurants. Frank and Dougal wanted to go to a pub called "_Ye Old AK-47_," Jr. wanted the one were you can watch the Teletubbies while you eat, Kamek wanted the "Kill Yoshi" fun house and Ben wanted a banana tree. But Peach (being spoilt) got her own way and they went to the Bob'omb restaurant (God knows why she wanted that one. Actually he doesn't).

Inside the restaurant they went to the owner, who was the Big Bob'omb.

Henry: I'd like a menu, please.

Owner (in Pakistani accent): Ok, here you go.

Henry: Ok, I'd like the seafood pasta, please.

Owner: Sorry, we're out of that.

Henry: Ok, the pizza then.

Owner: Sorry, none of that.

Henry: How about the sushi?

Owner: None.

Henry: Lasagne?!?

Owner: None.

Henry: Fruit selection?!?

Owner: None.

Henry: Grapefruit?!?

Owner: None.

Several hours later…

Henry: **CRAPPY TESCO POTATOES?!?**

Owner: None.

Henry: **TINNED BEANS?!?**

Owner: None.

Henry: **SHIT?!? **

Owner: None?

Ben: Why the question mark?

Owner: Oh, because I think I feel a shit coming on.

Henry: **IS THIS EVEN A RESTAURANT?!?**

Owner: No, the restaurant's next door.

Henry just stared. He did this for several years, then got in a time machine and went back. He then burned the owner with a flamethrower.

Jr: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooetc.

Henry: Why?

Jr: Because he's a bomb you dick!

Henry: Oh shit….

**BOOM BANG BANG-A BOOM BOOM BOOOOOOOOOOOOM KAPOW WHIZZ CRACKLE BOOM BANG. **

Basil Brush: **Boom boom!!!**

Henry's gun shooting Basil's head off: **Boom boom!!! **

**BOOM BANG EXPLOSION SOUNDS BOOM **etc again.

And many hours later they headed home, taking turns to kick Henry in the cock.

When they got back they had to lock Bowser and Petey in a padded room so they didn't hurt themselves. Guess what; they were drunk.

Thanks to prince bowser6 for the review!


	5. Day 4

_Day 4 _

Gelato beach

Jr. was updating his Fan Fic on the hotel computer.

Dancing shy-guys Fiction rated-T Genre-Drama Author-Bow. Jr. Reviews-7 Published- Some random time Updated- now

Bo-bo the shy-guy was dancing. He liked dancing.

Do-do: Bo-bo, I say dancing is for cock-faces!

Bo-bo: Piss off Do-do! You can't condemn me of my dancing!

The computer said that "condemn" was spelt wrong.

Jr: Hmm, spelling suggestion is condom? What's that?

Later, at breakfast…

Bowser: Ok, now I could make a huge speech about the fact that we're going to sunny Gelato beach today, or I could just say that we're going to Gelato beach today. Either way we're going to Gelato beach today, so just face it; we're going to Gelato beach today. Did I mention we're going to Gelato beach today? Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay! We're going to Gelato beach today! So Mr. Bond, it appears we're going Gelato beach today. Hail Hitler, and we're going to Gelato beach today! Hey kids! We're going to Gelato beach today! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Oh God we're going to Gelato beach today! This is so scary! I think… we're going to Gelato beach today.

Dougal: Err, so where are we going today?

Frank: Oh, we're going to Ricco harbour today.

So at Gelato beach….

Peach: Ahh, so sunny, I think I might take-

Bowser: Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!

Peach: Actually, no.

Bowser: Awwwwwwwwwwwwww!

Kamek had a banana in his hand. Oh dear.

Ben: Gimme' or **DIE!**

Kamek: No, get lost- err, get back! Shoo! Shoo! Ow! Err, fetch! (throws banana into jungle)

Ben: Crap (chases after it).

Frank: Ahh.

Dougal: Ahhhhhhh.

Frank: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Dougal: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Frank: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Dougal: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Frank: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Dougal: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Frank: **Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! **

Dougal: **AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! **

Frank: **Goddammitstoptryingtoyawnlongerthanmeyerpieceofshit!**

Meanwhile….

Ben was braving the dangers of the jungle, looking for the banana. He jumped over pits of lava. He wrestled lions. He ran from stampeding elephants. He avoided savage, cannibal natives. He played "Mario Kart DS" against Tarzan.

Ben: One way- or another. I'm gonna find you- I'm gonna getcha' getcha' getcha' getcha'!

Back on Gelato beach, a cattaquack was sneaking up on Peach. It slowly crept up on her, then…

Cattaquack: Three, two, one-

Octorok: Chedda!

It tossed Peach high into the air.

Peach: **SAVE MEEEEEEEEEEEE!**

Bowser: Ok, I've gotcha', I've gotcha- hey, cool! I can see up your skirt!

Jr. was playing with a ball.

Jr: Hey, Petey, play with me!

Petey was watching a portable T.V.

Petey: Sorry kid the footy's on!

Jr: Awwwwwwwww!

Meanwhile….

Ben looked at the banana. He was not ready to eat it, not quite yet.

Ben: Oh Holy Banana! Hear my pray!

And so he prayed as he dragged it back.

Thanks for the reviews! You guys are great! Read prince bowser6's stuff! It's funny!


	6. Day 5

_Day 5_

Freedom!

It was the middle of the night. Bowser was asleep and Peach was nearly there. Then suddenly Mario burst through the window.

Mario: Peach! We must escape, now!

Peach: Err, sorry Mario, but no. Bowser is really annoying me but this rules! It's a _free _holiday! Hey, do you want a dried apricot?

Mario: No thank you. I'm allergic to apricot.

Peach: No, that's prunes.

Mario: Oh yeah, so it is!

Suddenly, DJ Prune randomly jumped out of nowhere.

DJ Prune: I'm a prune! Yesh, yesh, **yeah! **I'm a p-p-pppppppppprrrrrrrrrune, dahlin'. I make you go; Poop-Diarrhoea; Poop-Diarrhoea.

Mario: Shut up!

DJ Prune: You want a piece o' mey?

Mario: No! Don't touch me! N-no! Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

DJ Prune poked Mario who turned really tiny and then Peach knoked him out the window.

Mario: (squeaking noises)

That morning at breakfast, Bowser (who was dressed in his best tuxedo) had an announcement to make.

Bowser: Ok, everyone! Today, as I have plans for Peach and me, you're all free to go anywhere in Delfino Plaza that you please!

Peach: Err, Bowser?

Bowser: Yes?

Peach: Where are we going?

Bowser: Oh, to the most romantic restaurant in town!

King Boo: Oh, I'm fine to stay up in my room…

Before leaving, Kamek decided to follow King Boo to the attic, to see what he was up too. On the way, he found out that all the pink boo steps were gone, so he had to climb up the wooden pole in the centre of the room. Eventually, he reached the attic. He opened the door, expecting a crappy little room. What he got was a huge room. Well, it was an attic. But there was a swimming pool, several statues of boos and, at the far end, a throne with King Boo on it. Stranger yet, over seventy little white boos were zipping around, some fanning their king.

King Boo: Greetings, Kamek.

Kamek: Ok, where did the boos, the pool and the statues come from?

King Boo: Remember those pink boos in the hallway?

Kamek: Yeah?

King Boo: Well, these are them. I freed them.

Kamek: Weren't they pink?

King Boo: Yes, but I changed their colour. I'm not interested in boos that were obviously manufactured by Barbie!

Kamek: Barbie don't manufacture boos!

King Boo: Oh, that's what they _want _you to think…

Kamek: What about the other stuff?

King Boo: Oh, my little friends helped me make all that.

Kamek: Ok, well, bye!

King Boo: Have a nice day! (sucker)

Meanwhile….

Ben was running along the pavement, looking for bananas. Then, suddenly, a limo swept past him and a hand pulled him in. Inside the limo was a rich moviemaker.

Moviemaker: Ok, let's just get straight to the point. I'm making a film of "Bowser's summer holiday." So far the cast is fab: Beyonce as Peach, Jack Black as King Boo, David Tennant as Henry, two parrots as Frank and Dougal, Mike Myers as Mr. Doolally, Eddie Murphy as Bowser Jr, some random retard as Petey Piranha, Jonti Picking as Kamek and Bruce Willis as Bowser. I was thinking of whom to play Ben, and then I had a brainstorm; Why not get Ben to play Ben? So, are you in? You'll get paid forty bananas every week!

Ben: **HOLY CRAP!!! **You bet I'm-

Moviemaker: On second thoughts, I think we'll get Orlando Bloom to play Ben. Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

So the moviemaker chucked Ben out of the car and left him to look for bananas.

Meanwhile…

Petey had gone into the local doctors and was having a check up. The doctor had some terrible news for him.

Doctor: I'm sorry Petey, but you're retarded.

Petey: Duh! Tell me something I don't know!

Doctor: Emc squared!

Petey: Duh! Tell me something I don't know!

Doctor: The meaning of life is…

Petey: Duh! Tell me something I don't know!

Doctor: Look! A flying tapir with a machine gun, and Sudan Hussein is riding it!

Petey: Duh! Tell me something I don't know!

Octorok: Chedda cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeese!

Petey: Duh! Tell me something I don't know!

Doctor: You're called Petey Piranha!?!

Petey: **WOW!!! **I am? Oh gee thanks! All these years I've thought I was called Howard!

Meanwhile…

Peach and Bowser were at "The most romantic restaurant in town."

At McDonald's…

Peach: Is this supposed to be the most romantic restaurant in town?

Bowser: Yep!

Peach: Sigh….

Bowser: I'll go get the food!

So Bowser walked over to the counter.

McDonalds guy: Can I take you're order please?

Bowser: I'd like a Girls Happy Meal with one of those "Polly pocket" toys, and an extra big Big Mac.

McDonalds guy: Ok.

Meanwhile…

Kamek and the "kids" were at the Yoshi's Island play-centre. Bowser Jr. was playing in the ball-pit, and Frank and Dougal were playing with toy AK-47s. Kamek was bursting balloon yoshis.

Kamek: Mwa ha ha ha! This is fun! Oh yes!

Meanwhile….

Henry went into a shoe-polishing shop. There were a few people hanging around, and one noki kneeling on the floor, polishing a shoe.

Henry: I have something for you to polish!

Noki: ……yes?

Henry: Polish this.

Henry handed the noki his prize bazooka.

Noki: But sir! This is a gun!

Henry: So what?

Noki: We don't polish guns!

Henry: (gun clicking noise) You do now!

Noki: Y-yes sir! Of course sir! Right away sir! Don't blast my head open, sir!

So the noki started to polish the gun, and Henry sat down and picked up a magazine.

Henry: And no crappy polishing!

Noki: Yes, sir!

Meanwhile…

Mr.Doolally was robbing a bank. For money. He likes money.

Mr.Doolally: Could I take money out of my bank account?

Banker (who just happens to be an old noki): Of course. Which account?

Mr.Doolally: All of them!

Banker: Surely not!

Banker's son: Daddy! I want a story!

Mr.Doolally: Young boy! Who is your dad!

Banker's son: My dad is a banker.

Mr.Doolally: Now, say that while pulling your mouth open.

Banker's son: My dad is a w-

Banker: No son! Bad boy! You shouldn't listen to blah blah blah…

While the banker was banging on about nothing in particular, Mr.Doolally nicked all the money and zoomed off on his cloud.

Banker: Call the police!

Several police dogs magically appeared and started to chase Mr.Doolally.

Banker: Well, that was helpful.

(prince bowser6 had some of the ideas in the approaching section)

Mr.Doolally was well ahead. But then the problems started. His cloud had a query.

Cloud: Mr.Doolally, this is wrong! You can't just take money like this!

Mr.Doolally: Have you got a problem with this?

Cloud: Yes!

Mr.Doolally: Then get lost!

Cloud: No! Old friend! Listen to me!

Mr.Doolally: No. Piss off.

Cloud: Fine!

So his cloud flew away, leaving small, puffy, white clouds in its wake. Then Mr.Doolally got on a little bike and started to pedal. But the bike was crappy and slow, so the dogs soon caught him. And then-

Mr.Doolally: Arrgh! Oh god help me! **CLOUD!!!** Help me!

Cloud: Oh I'll just take all this money and give it to charity.

Mr.Doolally: **Cloud?!? **

Cloud: I'll come back for you.

Dog: Grr, **SNAP!!! **

Mr.Doolally: **OW!!! **Hey! That's _not _a sausage!

Yay! Pretty long chapter! I hope it was good! (considering you've had to wait)


End file.
